We received notification yesterday that we have been cleared to close on our land and could do so as early as this Friday. In just another week or so, we will officially become landowners.
In one week, I will be officially launching my business.
Am I losing my mind? I’ve been asking that question as these two really big life changes are happening simultaneously. Is it crazy to take on the additional expense of owning property, and potentially the additional stress of selling our home and building a new one, at the same time that I’m working long hours to get my business up and running and cutting back at my 9 to 5? Maybe. The crazy part doesn’t really bother me all that much. I think life needs a little crazy. But is it reckless? That’s more so what keeps me up at night and brings on the anxiety.
The truth is, I don’t think it’s reckless but I worry that’s what others think.
My truth is, I’m just walking through open doors and seizing opportunity as it comes. It has been MONTHS since I initially thought about leaving my job and doing something new. Since the beginning of the year, really. It started out as a question, then it turned into a nagging, then it became relentless. After my trip to Santa Barbara in April, I came home still unsure what I wanted to do but absolutely positive it needed to happen before December. I met with a financial advisor, then an accountant, then a lawyer. I put in a lot of time and research and crunched a lot of numbers before finally deciding on starting my own practice in July. Reckless? Not even close.
As for the land, I’ve talked enough on here for you to know that building our own home wasn’t a spontaneous urge. It has been on our minds and in our hearts consistently for the past seven years. So, when houses started selling like wildfire, we asked the question: What would it take to find some land and build a house? We didn’t think we were quite ready but we figured we were in a place to research and gather information. So we met with builders and talked to real estate agents. We reached out to lenders and designers and architects (no, I’m not exaggerating–I have spoken to ALL of these people). We looked at land in Michigan and near my in-laws. In the end, we decided to stay where we are, in the school district we originally wanted for our girls, and look for a specific type of property in a very specific area of the county. Reckless? I don’t think so.
Trusting the process and walking through open doors. It’s one of the things I wrote on my goals list this morning but it could have been one of my gratitudes as well. I’m so thankful for these opportunities and I recognize how lucky I am to have them. Rachel Hollis often talks about her daily gratitude practice as a way to combat her anxiety. Gratitude and anxiety cannot live side-by-side, she says. I’m finding the same to be true. If I allowed myself to dwell on the enormity of these life changes, or the timing of them, or even what others might think of them, I would be consumed by anxiety and miss out on feeling thankful.
Sometimes life opens a bunch of doors at once and everything feels chaotic. Other times life closes a bunch of doors at once and everything feels chaotic. Trust the process. Be grateful always. And pay no attention to what anyone else may think. It’s your life, darling. They’re your dreams. Go get em.